Life is short. Too short for being petty. Too short for holding onto grudges and ill will. Too short to worry about tomorrow.
So that person you hate? Turn it around. Look at them through a different lens. Are they insecure? Shy? Yearning? Compassion is the key.
Those restaurants you refuse to patronize – really? Is it worth it? The businesses you’ve boycotted, the people you turn away – why? Is the energy output equal to the immensity of whatever transgression you’re holding onto?
The thing about holding on is that it makes you sick. Frankly, it can kill you. The illnesses we experience – from allergies to cancer and beyond – have a direct connection to our emotional wellness. So take a good look inside. What are you holding onto? What rage has been deposited in your tissues? You may want to cleanse it out, for your own good.
When my kids bicker at each other, I remind them to have compassion. Look for the good, I often say. It’s there in everyone, in every situation. It’s important to take stands, to stand up for yourself and for Right. But it’s also important to let a moment go completely when it’s done and move on.
My father is a great example of this. Once a situation passes, he’s done with it. It’s like it never happened. He doesn’t hold grudges. And he’s the least stressed person I know.
What would that feel like? To let it all go and just know everything’s going to be alright? You can do it. I dare you.
There are people who don’t like me out there. I may have led them to those feelings or maybe I didn’t. Regardless, I love them for it. Thank you, I say, for freeing me from the illusion of whatever I thought we had. For letting me go so I can let you go. For setting me free to find the right people for my life.
The people we surround ourselves with have a huge impact on our well-being and our success. So choose carefully. Be wise. Be selective. Make choices rather than being backed into them out of guilt or obligation. So you don’t invite someone to the party. Oh well. They probably won’t invite you.
And it’s not the end of the world.
I’m a fan of honesty, through and through. I would like to live in a world where there’s no faking it, just brutal truth. I hate playing games. I don’t like having to pretend that I feel a way that I don’t. And I wish we didn’t have to.
Construct the world you want. You’re the one who has to inhabit your life, no one else. Make it a life worth living.