Are You Making Yourself Sick?

winter_survival_guide Do you ever get a headache from worrying over what has already happened, what you can’t get back? Or maybe you get random headaches (or stomach aches or hair is falling out or you can’t sleep at night) and you don’t know what, exactly, causes it.

Here’s the thing: we make ourselves sick. And we can make ourselves well.

tumblr_n39nwlPm6d1sbub06o1_500The way you live your life, what you think about, what you waste time on, what you make time for, what you eat, what you don’t eat, and the types of conversations you have are just a few of the details we have control over in our everyday lives that can make the difference between health and sickness.

I don’t think anyone on earth would willingly admit to wanting to be sick. Of course not. It doesn’t make sense.

But we do it to ourselves all the time.

We just don’t own up to it.

The blame game can make you sick too. I’m a victim, this happened TO me, he/she is so mean, it’s all their fault, I wish my life were different, blah blah blah.

You can steer the conversation in another direction.

Today is a rainy day in Southeast Michigan. Gray and gloomy.

81Oz0h7o9SL._SL1500_51O43qenbpL._SX500_Or look at it this way: today is a quiet day with steady rain falling from the sky, a perfect day to snuggle up with this book I am loving (Herman Wouk’s The Winds of War), spend time with my husband, make a steaming cup of my favorite tea, perhaps I’ll bake cookies or maybe I’ll watch an old episode of Downton Abbey because I am so excited the new season starts tomorrow.

It’s a good life.

That’s how I choose to look at it. I had a massage first thing this morning from my lovely friend Fiona, who is the best massage therapist in the world. (I should know. I’ve had massages literally all over the world.)

I shopped for a bit with my fun friend David, for the table and lamps we needed in the living room. And while we were at it, we talked and laughed and smiled and hugged and found towels for the master bathroom. Now a copper lamp sits on my desk and the Tiffany lamp I’ve had forever sits underneath the window for everyone to enjoy.

And then I came home. The day started with a silent dusting of snow along my long driveway and I took a picture because it was so peacefully beautiful.

At some point, the day evolved into rain, and yes it’s cold and icy rain, but who cares. It feels good to be alive.

To breathe in the crisp air and the damp smell of a fresh rain and know that everything happens as it should.

If we believe that, then we don’t get sick. When we give in to worry and angst and anger and depression, we do.

When I look back at 2014, I see an incredible year of travel to places I never thought I’d visit. Wonderful family time. I deepened my photography hobby. I made difficult but strategic business decisions.

186792072I bought my dream house with the love of my life. I hosted parties in my wonderful backyard, where we roasted marshmallows over the fire pit and plucked green beans from my son’s ever-growing plant.

While it was a year of wonderful and abundant client work, it was also a year of bad hiring decisions and having to let cantankerous people go. It was a year of mistakenly taking on a couple clients I shouldn’t have taken on and having to disentangle my company from them.

And because I am so sensitive, there was a lot of transference of bad energy from people attracted to me whom I should never have allowed into my life.

clouds1I’ve always seen the good and not dwelled on the bad, but I am realizing how important it is to acknowledge the bad, accept it, and release it into the world. Let it go once and for all so it doesn’t hover in the crevices and corners of ourselves, making us sick.

It’s all within our control. Choose the people, the thoughts, the words, the activities and it makes all the difference. Empower yourself to realize it is all your choice – not someone else’s heaping stuff on you.

And see how you fare. My guess is, you’ll sail along above the clouds, breathing deeply, peace within your soul.

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