Have I told you that I believe in signs? If I haven’t, then I’ve done a disservice to all the many readers of my blog because yes, I have always believed in signs, and I do not in any way believe in coincidences.
But this blog will not go there – another will, I promise. (Perhaps after I see Rebecca Rosen on Monday at Rock Financial.)
This blog is about finding love. And yes, I am coming out – I’ve found it.
Two years after deciding to get divorced, a year and a half of living alone and LOVING it, after launching the most productive, most inspiring, easiest and most soothing time of my life … I found love.
Now, I must say, I’ve found it twice. First, with myself and with the quiet. If you don’t love the silent moments with no one around, if you can’t get on a plane by yourself and not hide behind People magazine and your iPod, and without someone to meet you at the gate on the other end, then you may not find love with another. Just my opinion.
When I told my mother that I was thinking of filing for divorce, I added, “Because then I can find the love I’ve always wanted.”
Leave it to Mom to splash cold water on my face. “Well don’t get divorced thinking you’re just going to get remarried right away,” she said.
I sulked. I pouted. I figured my parents, even at this age, just don’t understand me!
But actually, she was 100% right. (Mom, I hope you hear this!)
It took a while after that conversation before it hit me smack in the face: I would rather be alone for the rest of my life than remain in a miserable marriage. So I pulled the plug. And I ventured out onto the waves, cascading in the sun, drinking in the air like I’d never breathed before.
It was a fun first summer and then the fall came and boy was I busy. My business grew, I dabbled in dating, and a whole host of married men made passes at me. (What is that about?)
One year turned into two. I spent my first birthday after the divorce alone and without my kids, but I ate foie gras at an old Victorian house-turned-restaurant in the Willamette Valley and I loved every minute. The second birthday since the divorce, my best friend was here, with her kids, and mine, and other friends streamed in and we barbecued steaks and made a salad that I’ll never forget. We drank Amarone until the evening cooled.
Every day is like a birthday when you’re living the life you choose. It’s the moments that carry meaning, like little birds with food in their beaks for their young. (By the way, yesterday a bird flew right into the side window on my car. What the ?)
And so I didn’t see it coming when Dan popped up online. And instead of doing what I always did – email a lot, maybe give my number and then we’ll see – I said, “Let’s meet.” Now.
It’s easy. It’s fun. It’s simmering with excitement. I haven’t changed my relationship status on Facebook, but I’m telling you here: I’ve found something fantastic with an amazing man.
That’s all you get for now. Stay tuned for more. When he reads this, I bet he’ll be kicking his heels. And later, we’ll laugh like we always do because life is better when you’re happy.