Eye rolls. OMGs. Exclamations just because. Requests for Frappuccinos.

In the car: he’s annoying me! She’s looking at me. He’s such a jerk. 

I tagged the wrong place on the photo. I tagged the wrong photo. I looked at him wrong. I said the wrong thing. I am simply wrong by being here. My very essence is wrong.

Laugh, laugh, laugh.

So embarrassing. SO embarrassing. Everything is a mortification of their very being. How can I even be here? The nerve.

Those words are NOT ok in playing Mad Libs with your 8-year-old brother. Please do NOT tell me that I look bad in a photo or my hair is thinning. Yes, I asked for honesty, but not to this degree.

I am not ready to be dropping people off a block away so as not to embarrass them. I still want to be connected to these precious souls, to spend time with them, to influence them.

But they believe they are beyond influencing. They know everything. They know better than everyone else. They have nothing left to learn.

And the words that come out of their mouths: OMG, is all I can say. Really? You talk to me that way? You talk to anyone that way?

This is like the end of pregnancy. If you’ve been nervous about the searingly painful act of giving birth, you get to a point in the 8th month when you no longer care and you just want this baby out.

So it goes with tweens and teens. You can’t imagine letting them go off on their own to college, to adult life, to Real Life, and then the behavior sets in and you think, I can deal with this, it’ll be ok when they go. It’s what’s meant to be.


On the way to the beach, there was all manner of tween exhilarations and behaviors and exclamations and affronts. We sat in the front seat, not understanding and not getting it.

By. Doing. Nothing.

I love my kids to the moon and beyond, and I believe we can ride the waves of tweenhood. Somehow, we’ll all get through this, and they’ll grow up and mature and we’ll shrink back to be put in our places and still come out on top, loving them, them loving us, all good in one big family, which is truly like a clothes dryer throwing everything around in one big swirl and somehow it all comes out OK.

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